How to overcome the addiction to partner?
Mar 2
posted by Michael Smith in
Relationship, 2012
| 0 Comments
I liked this. I have been working on eliminating "I will miss you" from
my vocabulary and instead focus on what is here now. Missing is an
emotion of lack for me and I chose to focus on what I do have.
love
M/M
[email protected] wrote:
A reply from some time ago…
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Your addiction to your partner...
When you base your feeling of happiness on something outside of yourself
it does not work ?- you will never feel fully fulfilled.
Your feeling of well-being is dependant on something that is not under
your control.
If they were to die, or leave, you would have a choice: curl up and be
depressed; find another partner - with whom to depend upon for happiness;
be with yourself and feel what you are feeling.
If you look to the past, or the future, you are not here.
The depth of the state of well-being is in this moment. Only this moment.
If you look back you are not here; if you look forward you are not here.
Life/living is here now. Now.
Missing something is not here; looking forward to something is not here.
And there is only here. Missing something equals not being here; looking
forward to something equals not being here.
When your partner is not there, be where you are, in each moment.
When the mind goes one nanosecond to the past, or future, you will not be
here now, and you will feel missing. Be in each moment ? just each moment,
and be with how it is, or take responsibility, and change it.
Either be here, and feel what you are feeling, or go there, but not here
complaining about not being there. Be responsible.
If you have decided to be where you are, and your partner is not there (or
even if they are there) just be with who you are, in that very moment.
Do not listen to the addictive process of the mind. Be where you are,
exactly as you are. If you are away, and missing them, and you have
decided to stay away, just feel exactly what you are feeling, and accept
it.
Don’t complain it is not intelligent.
(In the film What the Bleep one scientist keeps saying that when you look
at
an object, say, a chair, a certain part of the brain is activated. If you
are blindfolded and asked to think of the chair, the same part of the brain
is activated in exactly the same way. So when we look ? do we see a chair,
or our brain activation? When we see our partner, do we see out partner,
or our brain simulation?)
